Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
