No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
