Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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