I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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