nut hugger
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
