I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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