i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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