try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
