I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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