I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
