Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You've changed since you got that strap on
My butt remains clenched, sir.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
