the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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