I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize