Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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