who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
