There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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