i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
