Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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