Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
