i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
