Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
