I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
