he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
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