watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I need water and some morals
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
Randomize