belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
You need a sexual gate keeper
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
