i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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