No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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