Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
