Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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