Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
