wake up i wanna do it froggy style
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
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