I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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