She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
