I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
