You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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