OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
