Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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