Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
