So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
