im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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