i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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