white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Welp...herpes.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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