my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
