a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
