is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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