your thong is hanging out like whoa
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
