i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
he laminated a picture of his dick.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize