are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
