Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
