can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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